Carl Hiaasen Quotes

Garcia wondered why people with JESUS stickers on their bumper always drove twenty miles per hour under the speed limit. If God was my co-pilot, he thought, I'd be doing a hundred and twenty.

Hey. Sometimes life is a shit flavored Popsicle.

I’m waiting for the day when Rush Limbaugh’s pharmacist writes a book.

In his own mind, it was never a matter of courage. But courage it was.

Please don't grow up to be one of those men who lie for the sport of it, and most men do. That's a fact. That's why the world is so messed up, Noah. That's why history books are full of so much heartache, and tragedy. Politicians, dictators, kings, phoney-baloney preachers-most of 'em are men, and most of 'em lie like rugs